Recently, I have heard on TV “Every single girl has her own beautiful dreams; however, after getting married, the whole world is only her husband and kids and her family in law, that’s all”. It really refused me. It seems that the world and even all female themselves have treated unfairly to women, aren’t they?
Let’s see. One of my cousins, long time ago, she wished to become a journalist. Unfortunately, her family got financial problems, she had to study in a college instead of a university, and her major is Chemical in Food and Beverage, not Journalist at all. After graduating, she became a textile worker, and got married few years later. Now, she is a wife, a mom, and her job is a nanny in a kindergarten school. Once, meeting her, I asked “how about you dream, sis.?” Regrettably, she said “Maybe, I forget it”.
Another story is my friends’; actually, I am not really close to her. We were classmate in high school, and have not met for around ten years. These days, some of my friends told me her story. She is a Marketing Executive and has a successful career path. Plus, all her parents, siblings, cousins, friends, and colleagues lives in Vietnam whilst her fiancée is working in Japan. By this reason, she has to leave all beloved people and things just to Japan. Of course, that is her choice, and her love story is admirable; but somehow, I think she is sacrificing her dreams for her man. If that is love, love is not fair at all.
The same to my mother, since she was a maiden, she hoped to become a nurse. At that time, war occurred in Vietnam, so the living standard was so bad, and people thought it is not necessary to allow girls gain knowledge because their main roles is a taking care of her family. Therefore, my mom studied toughly to fulfill her dream. Sadly, after the independence, nothing was improved, even worse for years, and my mom had to work as a seller in the Cooperative to get rice and food instead of salary to feed my grandparents’ family. Gradually, the living standards became better, but she was over 30, and my grandfather forced her get married, her dream seems gone with the wind….
In spare time, I wondered if she still wishes to be a nurse, and why she does not realize it and should I be a nurse instead. Smiling and knocking on my forehead, she asked:
-How and why, fool? I have you and your younger sister now, I have to take care of you both, and your youngest brother, too (our puppy). All of you are my concerns, how can I study, or practice to be a nurse; in some way, I am old, daughter. And… You have your own dream, I know. Fulfill it, not mine! And, hurry up! Time does not wait for you.It will never come true after your marriage!
Her answer was lightly and peaceful, but I felt spicy in my eyes….I have not met many people, but almost every woman I know in my life devotes dreams and career paths for her family, husband and kids. In contrast, only a few men can spend time for his family because they are too busy with their businesses, friends, drinks, or he prioritizes these things than his beloved people. Only one question appear in my mind “How about women’s dreams?”